The flashback caught her by surprise . She thought 7 years later the memories were gone. Or at least faded. A suppressed memory surfaced?
The terror she felt 7 years ago was as fresh as it was tonight.
His heavy footsteps to their flat were of those after a heavy night of drinking...Or was it two? Sometimes it stretched to 3 nights and the kids nor her would see him.
The past two months he'd bought no food for the house, eating out and coming only to shower and occasionally sleep.
One rainy night their slightly over a year baby and her were thrown out of the house into the falling rain because he was angry.
A kind bachelor in the same block of flats shared his couch with mother and baby. When they returned home early, he'd left already.
Tonight what surprised her was the clarity of the flashback. Like it was yesterday. Sounds and smells so real. The rage. It was raining that night.
His heavy footsteps were now outside the bedroom thay she shared with him and the baby. He was breathing heavily.
He tried the locked door as she prayed he'd choose the couch in the sitting room. She hadn't recovered from the last blackeye.
No he didn't take the locked door suggestion kindly and at 3 am he didn't care if he woke up the block of flats residents, He was going to have his way.
He was a big man. She wasn't. The Ceasarean Section to have their child had taken her strength. Recovery in this situation wasn't coming fast enough.
3 kicks and he was in the room. The sound of the wooden door frame splintering vivid in her memory.
Terror filled her heart. Terror she'd never known. Hell had filled her sanctuary. The nest she had prayed to rest in and build a life of hope..a fresh start.
She curved her body over the babys' to protect him. Pain.
Blood.
Everywhere..The baby today is now a shoe size smaller than her. Her one focus for his life is to know real and authentic love. And in that love there's security, love is safe. Anything else is not love
1 Corinthians 13:4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking,it is not easily angered,it keeps no record of wrongs.
6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
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